The Missing Piece in Fertility: Forgiving Yourself
When you’re on a fertility journey, it’s not just your body you’re working with. It’s your mind. Your emotions. The energy you carry every day. One of the most overlooked but powerful tools in this process? Forgiveness.
What Does Forgiveness Look Like?
Forgiveness doesn’t mean pretending something didn’t hurt. It doesn’t mean excusing what went wrong or bypassing the pain. Forgiveness is about releasing the grip those hurts, judgments, or resentments have on your body and spirit.
Sometimes forgiveness looks like:
Letting go of the harsh way you’ve spoken to yourself.
Recognizing that you did the best you could with the information and resources you had.
Choosing not to carry blame for things outside your control.
Softening toward your body instead of fighting against it.
Why Forgiveness Matters for Fertility
In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), unprocessed emotions create stagnation. Stagnation is heavy, slow, and sticky. Its the opposite of the openness and flow needed for conception. When resentment, self-blame, or shame build up, they create energetic “traffic jams” that weigh down the body and spirit.
Forgiveness helps release that stuck energy. It makes space. It clears the heaviness so your body can shift back toward balance. And balance is what TCM recognizes as the foundation for fertility.
Opening to Receive
Fertility is not just about ovulation tests and lab numbers. It’s about receptivity. The ability to open physically, emotionally, and energetically. Forgiveness is part of that opening.
When you forgive yourself, you create space for softness.
When you forgive others, you clear out lingering hurt that keeps your body tense.
When you let go, you signal to life itself: I am open to receive.
Forgiving Yourself First
Here’s the truth: most women I see in my clinic aren’t struggling to forgive others…they’re struggling to forgive themselves.
Thoughts like:
“Why didn’t I start sooner?”
“Why did I waste time in that relationship?”
“Why did I stay on birth control for so long?”
“Why didn’t I take better care of myself earlier?”
These thoughts pile on shame and pressure, making your journey even heavier. But here’s what’s really happening: those thoughts are your brain’s way of trying to protect you from the reality of uncertainty. Once you accept where you are without blame, you finally free yourself to get the right, targeted support for your body.
From Overwhelm to Clarity
When we’re buried in guilt and comparison, we often try to “do it all”. The supplements, diets, protocols, apps, treatments. It’s overwhelming and confusing. But when you clear the clutter through forgiveness, you create space to see the real root imbalance. And once you see that, healing becomes possible.
This is the work I do in my practice: helping women clear the noise, identify what their body truly needs, and create the conditions for fertility to flourish.
✨ Final Thought: Forgiveness may not be the first step you think of on a fertility journey. But it can be the one that unlocks the space you’ve been missing. Its the space your body, mind, and spirit need to move from stuck to receptive.